Braindump for LDS Housewife Writer Chick.
I've read enough Bulwer-Lytton contest entries that to me these had the whiff of deliberate bad writing, so I did some Snopes snooping. Sure enough, the analogies are from a bad-writing contest the Washington Post did in 1995 called "Style Invitational." Here's a link to the Snopes article.And here's a link with a full version of the WaPo article the analogies come from.These are so funny. It definitely takes a special talent to write so badly on purpose.
Oh, I'm so disappointed these analogies weren't written by real high schoolers. I've read these before and think they are an absolute scream and always imagine 16-year-olds scratching their heads in English class, earnestly trying to come up with something. My favorites are surreal "Wheel of Fortune" and "He was as tall as a 6'3" tree." Oh well, now someday I can compare overwhelming disappointment to the feeling I had when I discovered bad high school analogies weren't really written by bad high schoolers but by grown up individualswho submitted their offerings to the 1995 Washington Post Style Invitational.
Now, if you want to see some TRULY bad writing, I can send you some of my Microbiology students' term papers...
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