Well, it's been and gone and it hardly affected me this year. I think that's because I had to lead the primary children in their sacrament meeting serenade--my first time leading in public. I was too nervous to think about much else or do anything but laugh at the usual "angel mother" talks.
I did manage to squeeze in some time missing my own mom, though not as much as I did last week at Ben's baptism. I feel further and further away from her every year. Did I ever really know her? I have the sneaking feeling that I am missing my daydreams of the relationship we would have if she were here more than I'm missing her in particular. I hope she'll forgive me for that. (If I were gone, I would want my kids to miss ME in particular. ME ME ME.)
Speaking of ME ME ME, I did get some nice pampering. Nothing is better than the door popping open and all my little guys walking in with shy grins and a tray of breakfast. Then they want to sit in bed with me while I eat it, and Roger hauls them out so I can get my favorite thing: quiet. I also got a nice, loooong nap in the afternoon (very important since I was up until 2 a.m. two nights before--see previous post on bookgroup).
Someone once asked me what I would suggest they assign as the topic for people to speak on on Mother's Day (they probably asked me because I whine so much about the talks). I didn't even have to think about it. Here's what the topic should always be on Mother's Day: the atonement. It's the only hope for any mother. It has more to do with motherhood than anything else has.
Here's my wish for all the mothers out there (and a reminder to myself): if you felt twinges on Mother's Day about the ways you don't measure up to the Angel Mothers you heard praised in sacrament meeting, ask the Lord whether you should be working on something, or repenting of something. If so, sipmply repent and do better. Don't agonize! Forgive yourself, and your kids, and your own mother. But, also, ASK THE LORD WHAT YOU'RE DOING RIGHT. He'll tell you if you ask. I know; I've tried it. And what's more precious than that?
1 comment:
The "Angel Mother" talks are pretty old, huh? My good friend (and mom of young kids) spoke in sacrament meeting for mothers day. Her goal was to not make any mothers in the congregation feel guilty for anything, and I think she succeeded! She had also been to women's conference and she used a lot of what she learned there. Especially Mary Ellen Edmunds "All the Time you need" talk and Emily Watt's "Today While the Sun Shines". I really enjoyed my friend's talk, and the chocolates they handed out instead of flowers.
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